Ok, Day Three

I am officially on day three of a vegan, whole foods, plant based diet. I've noticed changes in how I feel already (minus the new things blooming that are flaring my allergies and the maintenance guys mowing the lawn at work triggering my asthma). I already knew that I liked oatmeal for breakfast. Now I love them. Quick oats, some flax meal, some nuts, and dehydrated fruit, with some coconut milk and agave syrup added after it is cooked. YUM! Though I've noticed that most commercially available dried fruits have both sugar and soybean oil... Luckily, my mom dehydrates fruit every year, so I'm getting some from her and mixing it in with the less-awesome stuff I have in my pantry. I've definitely bonded with quinoa, and have created some interesting and increasingly tasty dishes using it. Since I'm also cutting way back on oils, I've had to get used to cooking things without them... I use a short spray of Pam for tofu and then pan fry it. It cooks up fantastically!!! I've been cutting it into fun shapes (I like triangles!!!) to add visual interest. :)  Last night, I did quinoa (which I had cooked in vegetable stock previously) with tofu and edamame with some balsamic vinegar, topped with a balsamic glaze from Trader Joe's. It was DELICIOUS!!!! And filling.

My sugar cravings were bad yesterday. But I powered through. Frozen bananas with some semi-sweet mini chocolate chips helped the cravings. It didn't make it go away, but it made things more do-able. I'm looking forward to the cravings diminishing and my taste-buds getting used to a lower sweetness level. Meanwhile... I keep trying to power through. Tonight, I attacked the cravings with Rainier Cherries and my own Chocolate Coconut Milk!! It's really helping, and just has some cocoa powder, vanilla extract, and agave syrup blended with coconut milk. Not Darigold, but it's hitting the spot. I'm fighting through my soda cravings, too. Although those are not as easily fooled with coconut milk...

Amazing news: Since Sunday, I'm down 3 pounds. My mom is excited, since I'm still in "the age group where your body responds quickly, unlike the age group quickly approaching 62 that doesn't listen to much of anything you do". Chris and I are both excited about me shrinking. :) He loves me regardless, but we'd both like less of me to love!!! Hopefully this will jumpstart weightloss and change my food habits permanently, which will help keep the size of Sarah diminishing! I also think the anti-inflammatory benefits will be awesome. I'm looking forward to less joint and muscle pain. 

Tonight's dinner was not as tasty as I had hoped... It is an old standby, but without the meat. Turns out, it really needs the meat... Lentils just did not cut it!! But it was worth a shot. Tomorrow, I'm making some sort of dessert. Probably chocolate mousse with tofu... Or chocolate zucchini muffins. Or.... Lots of possibilities. Have to go to the store again, though. I am lacking some spices and COMPLETELY forgot to get peanut butter!!! How do you do that??? Some really yummy recipes coming up that require peanut butter... So to the store I go tomorrow!!! (Bless you, Central Market, Trader Joe's, and WinCo. You have basically everything I need!!!!)

A whole new outlook

I hadn't realized that it had been so long since I posted. That is a good example of how things went this year. But. I now have a whole new outlook. I figured that since it's summer, and I have way fewer stressers going on, I would take a good hard look at lifestyle changes I could implement now and try to turn into habit. I have a few friends who have switched to a Plant Strong or Plant Based diet, meaning vegan/whole foods, and have felt amazingly better. So, after a few months of sort of thinking about it, I have decided to take the plunge. I want to make a change, and I need to reset my tastebuds and my body. So I'm going Vegan for 28 days. :) It's going to be interesting!!!! I've decided to blog about it to help me keep track of what helped, what didn't, what I liked, and what I really disliked.

So here's my baseline. Weight: Too much. :) No more details than that. Fatigue: Most of the time, though the change in meds seems to have helped that a little bit. Pain: Usually present in joints, neck, and some just general chronic pain. Joints: Stiff, achy. Regularly take advil or naproxen or tylenol. Motivation: Lacking for most things. Has improved a little bit with the meds, but still struggle a lot. Cravings: Cheese, Ice Cream, Sweets, Soda. I want them all the time. I try not to eat them all the time. But it's hard. I crave them. A lot.

My hopes for this month:
Reset my tastebuds away from creamy, buttery sauces, cheese, dairy, sodas. 

Bond more with a wider variety of vegetables.

Learn to cook a wider variety of healthy foods.

Get through a thorough detox from too many years of bad food choices.

Reduce inflammation.

Drop some weight.

Have more energy.

Walk more on the treadmill (along with the more energy!!)

Feel better.

Feel accomplished.

Learn new recipes!!

Enjoy cooking again.

So that's the intro to my new adventure. We'll see how it goes!! I'll share successes and failures and recipes and photos as I go along. I'm cautiously optimistic and excited to start. So, tomorrow morning: Oatmeal with soy milk, agave syrup, and fruit. With coffee with coconut milk creamer! And then.... Who knows!! I get to explore my cookbooks and start trying these foods instead of just getting the ingredients ready for them.

Woot!!!!

I feel successful. That is a wonderful feeling!! I should do a brief run-down of why it is so wonderful to complete something...
In my last post, I said that I was going to go to the doc at the end of the month for a physical and a meds check. Well, my mental and emotional health just tanked in the last couple of weeks. I felt hopeless, exhausted, like it was all I could do to get through the work day. I was pointless at home and our apartment looks like a tornado came through. So. I called and got in an 8am appointment with my doc. Apparently, my symptoms perfectly fit Seasonal Affective Disorder, and I had slid into a major depressive episode. Ah ha!! That fits PERFECTLY!!! So we switched my meds from Paxil (which I don't think worked well...) to Prozac. I waited around for the pharmacy to open and I swear I could feel the difference by that afternoon. Fingers crossed that this will work out well. The only real downside, though I have no medical statements for or against my theory, is that I may be going through withdrawals from the Paxil. While the recommendation from the doc was to not taper and just switch, from what I've read on various forums and sites, coming off of the Paxil can be really hard. I think my crazy dreams (so vivid, so intense, so unsettling), the rolling tingling and dizziness and lightheadedness, and the messed up sleeping may be due to coming off of that med. I'm hoping that this will pass quickly. On several forums, people wrote that exercising really helped with the dizziness. Apparently, that was the last encouragement I needed, and today I actually did it.
I made it to the Y!!
I got off my butt, into my gym clothes, and onto a bike. I rode the bike for an HOUR. I didn't push hard, as I haven't been very active in awhile. But I was steady!! And I increased the resistance.  Then I did the arm bike for a while and played with resistance until my arms were shaking (not hard, my upper body strength sucks).

While working out, I was able to watch the weather changing. Amazing views, of sunshine, then snow, then a bank of snow clouds coming in from Bremerton-area.

Beautiful!

 I was hoping that the workout would help the dizziness... Instead, I think it made things worse. But I am pushing through and enjoying the "natural antidepressants" that endorphins give you. Chris and I are going to go out to dinner for a Date Night, and then we will start packing.

Did I mention the exciting news? We have found an apartment, in Keyport, for less than we are paying now, with 200 more square feet and a fireplace. Our applications are in and *fingers crossed* we should hear soon about it. So I am starting to pack. Really, I'm starting to get rid of recycling and trash and crap that I've held onto for too long.
 Anyway, time to go to dinner with my man!!

Let's try this again!

It's only been a few months since my last post. That's about the last time I really did much towards health/weight loss. School started, and I've been sick. A lot. Not the drippy nose kind, but the crazy painful sinuses kind, and the exhaustion kind, and the stomach flu kind... And had a cough and nausea and lots of headaches. And did I mention the exhaustion? It was like I couldn't win. Cognitively, I wanted to go to the gym. Physically, I needed to go to the gym, but I just couldn't get there. I had also changed medication for my depression/anxiety, and the new stuff really isn't cutting it. I don't give a crap. About much at all. And I feel super ADD. Am so distractable and unfocused! And forgetful. Very forgetful. So I've sat.

After getting sick so much, I decided that it was past time to do SOMETHING. When the allergy office called about me not coming and getting my shots (can't get them when you're sick... I've been sick repeatedly), I said I was going to put it on hold since I haven't been healthy for more than a week and a half at a time since July. They pointed out that the Doc is also an immunologist. Ahhhhhh. Good point. So I made an appointment. I now have $85 in new meds and a followup appointment after I get some bloodwork done. Just have to get into the lab after 1 and before they close, so that a certain test that has to be done on live cells can be done... I still hate needles, so I'm working on getting up the nerve and the energy and the motivation to get to the lab. And did I mention that it's hard to give a crap about anything? Fun times. I've also made an appointment (finally....) to get a physical and do a meds review. Probably need to change to a different one... That actually works? That would be nice. I've been really "ah, what the hell" for the last couple months. Not so helpful...

So that brings me to the new year, starting out on a track that might (oh please???) lead to more energy, less illness, and more motivation to do... anything. I have wonderful and supportive friends who have offered to make standing dates at the Y to help me get there. I have 2 great docs who are working on trying to help me figure out what is going on. I have a mom who is as frustrated as I am about me being sick and tired all the time. I have a boyfriend who doesn't know what to do to help, but wants me to feel better. And I have me. I am smart and capable. I can navigate these obstacles, maybe take a nap when I get home and then go to the gym, and get through this crappy time. Oh, and get all my paperwork done in time... No stress!! While our apartment complex goes through the foreclosure process and Chris and I adjust to his working the night shift. Anyway, enough venting. I need to sleep and get through this cold so that I can make plans and implement them to make good lifestyle changes. And to get my butt to the lab... :) I hate getting blood drawn. Thank you if you read this much. You are important to me and I appreciate your support!!!

I need to remember....

...how much better I feel when I work out. Even when I'm super tired (like today), super stressed (like today), and super grumpy (like today), even just 20 minutes on the bike and/or eliptical makes life incredibly more possible!! I dragged my butt down to the gym and did the bike and then a little but on the eliptical (mostly because I wanted to watch some tv... but all I saw were commercials!! On EVERY CHANNEL), and now I feel like things aren't bad at all and that going back to work will be fine. And that I can face making dinner for a grumpy boyfriend. And possibly even clean out the catbox. I mean... if that isn't magic, then I don't know what is!! I DO know that I need more tank tops that aren't super tight so that I don't overheat and die while exercising, and I need some sweat rags... stupid side effect of a medication that I'm on makes me sweat at the drop of a hat... and my face is DRIPPING right now... SO not attractive!! Add those to my shopping list... for later. I'm DONE for the night! Time to shower. But I'm excited that I have reminded myself of this. Now, to get in my habit. Time to pack the gym bag for the car. A bigger bag to keep in there, and a smaller one (or two) to carry in with me. One for "land"based activities, and another for when I want to get in the water. That way, I can go STRAIGHT to the gym after work and have whatever I need!!! Oh, that means I need another sports bra, so I can always have a clean one... Add that to the list, if anyone's keeping track!! Can't have the girls knocking me out or taking over the world!!

I wonder if going to bed at 7pm is too early... Am pretty sure that some extra sleep this week will be appreciated by everyone who is stuck in meetings with me!! I get a little strangER when I'm tired... :)

The End of Summer???

How can the summer be ending? I never got into a routine at the Y. I am not super flexible from getting really into yoga. I am not buff and toned from lifting tons of weights. I am squishy and pale and not in a routine at all... but my knee is almost healed and the scar shouldn't be AWFUL... thanks to copious applications of shea and cocoa butters. I attempted yoga today... it was hot, my balance (what little I had) is GONE after 5 weeks of healing, and my right foot started aching and burning halfway through. Not my finest hour... I'm hoping it's just lack of practice and something out of alignment in my foot and not early onset arthritis. Whatever it was, it hurt. I sat for the last part and visualized the movements... I also had to modify a bunch because I can't kneel. I can barely kneel on my right leg, and not at all on my left! Child's pose was funny looking, with legs all splayed out and knees NOT on the floor... But I made it. And parts of me are sore already! I need to do this more often.

I want to go on my way home from work at least 3 days a week... If I just go straight to the gym, then I should be able to get something in before going home. I know I'll just want to sit when I get home, so I can't go home until after I work out!! Now, if only I can stick to that... No more 5 week lapses with minimal activity. It does bad things for everything. Even if I'm healing.

I'm looking forward to getting back in the pool, though I don't really like the Y's water classes... so I'm going to try to get into lap swimming. At least a little bit, and then some treading water and doing my own water aerobics movement stuff. But I want to wait until my knee is "fully approximated", i.e., closed all the way. I'm almost there. Just a small circle in the middle that is just a scab and not new skin yet. Once that is closed, then I won't feel like I have an open sore and am open to infections and other ickiness in a very communal pool!

My goals: get balance back... and better!! Increase endurance. Feel more confident. Get to the Y regularly!! :)

Wooo!

My knee is healing, albeit slowly... I took such a deep chunk out of part of my knee that it will take a few weeks to heal from the inside... Which means that the new skin is tender and too much stress on it makes my leg HURT. Like shooting pains up and down my leg hurt... That definitely makes me scared about doing too much too soon. Running around after Keiler and Emery created major pain. So I've been nervous about getting back to the YMCA to even do gentle stuff, like the eliptical or bike. I wanted to go on Sunday, but had some sort of stomach bug that made me feel absolutely icky!! So that was not going to happen. But. Bless Katie Sprague! Monday she messages me about meeting her at the Y to brave the cardio equipment. Perfection! It's the kind of great timing that you can't pass up. So I agreed. And just hoped that nothing would happen to derail those plans.
And I made it!! My goal was 20-25 minutes on the recumbant bike. Well. I did 37 minutes!! Katie and I just chatted away and sweated away and worked out for 37 minutes!! I'm excited. I feel fantastic, my knee doesn't hurt, and I have a new plan for my summer!! I had hoped to do lots of yoga this summer, but with not being able to kneel, that's not an option. :-(  So I'm going to try to go nearly every day and do at least half an hour on the bike or eliptical. :-) and probably do my weight room orientation. I like lifting weights, when I can make myself do it, so I want to get to know how to use all that cool stuff!!! Wish me luck!!